index
ã€
ã€
ã€
ã€
ã€
ã€
Previous


On confronting Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart after turning 40, by Eric Prideaux

pLondon, UK
S

tanding in my kitchen the other day, I was listening to the plinkety-plinkety of a Mozart piano concerto on the radio when something peculiar happened. I felt an odd sense of urgency--one echoing the frantic frillery of the melody. "Eric," old Wolfgang Amadeus seemed to call out as his fingers raced along the ivories. "What are you waiting for? You've turned 40. Start cooking with gas, already!" Gas? Gas! I turned my attention back to the cooker.

Let me back up. Why should a piano concerto threaten to trigger a mid-life crisis?

Back when I was a teenager, my mother told me I shouldnft hate Mozart so much. "Whatever you feel about him now," she said, "you'll learn to like him when you grow up." So now, at 40, this piano concerto was a great big test. I asked myself: Have I grown up? Do I now like Mozart? The answer to the first was "Uh, maybe" and to the second, a forceful "No." The music still sounded as silly and hysterical as ever. Like a drunk ballerina on rollerblades or something. Sorry.

Still, I decided that maybe I should finally give the man a chance. If there was anything unpleasant about turning 40 it was that I was still the same old me I ever was. Same old annoying habits. Same old pet peeves. Same old unmitigated disdain for Mozart. And being so unbending in my ways was getting, well, old.

Actually, these thoughts had started days earlier--at 30 minutes to midnight on a national holiday to be precise. The venue was a church or Masonic temple converted into a nightclub. Reggae pounded so loudly from the speakers that my clothes shook. Inevitably, a cloud of ganja filled the room and memories flooded me. gMy God,h I thought while glaring at people dancing around me. gI--I know Ifve been to parties like this in the past, long before folks started piercing their tongues and noses. But I can barely remember them!h I had turned ancient.

The crowd consisted largely of college kids. What had I accomplished since their age? What dreams could I check off?
  1. Great works of art? None.
  2. Literary prizes--even one? Nope.
  3. Wild flings? Disappointingly few.
And now, at 40, my prospects for such excitement were as dim as the lights in the club. Dimmer. As much as I still liked the reggae--and admired the girls rocking and swaying to it--the music packed none of the alluring promise of yesteryear.

Late the next morning, my ears still ringing from the club, I poured a mug of coffee. I felt empty, and switched on the radio to lift my spirits. And who should come tootling along again but Mozart, playing his little piano concerto.

My fingers instinctively leaped to the dial, but I stopped. If my mother and all of Mozart's other fans were right, there was something exciting and sublime to be discovered in the upper register of the piano line, transcendence to be found in the orchestrafs silk-and-lace accompaniment. It would refresh my approach to the world, make me new. Off in the mist, I...I could see a door, maybe to a magic forest whose delights Ifd been too young, blind and oafish to see. Too deaf to hear. Delights beyond the music of Mozart itself.

Happiness seemed to depend on coming to terms with this man in a powdered wig, Mozart, and what he appeared to be offering. I tip-toed to the door and touched the knob--listening, waiting for something to click.

Nothing did--except for the button on the radio when I finally shut it off. It's been weeks since Mozart banged out the final chord on his keyboard and pirouetted, giggling, back to the 18th century. It's no wonder he still makes me think of a drunk ballerina.

Let's face it: Mozart knew perfectly well he'd never win me over. But he didn't seem to mind. Maybe all he wanted was for me to just...imagine life beyond the door.

© 2010 All rights reserved
Carry On

Previous features
 

Riding with
the right


Innocent victims

 
Geisha for a day

 
Dance inside the surreal

 
New frame of mind

 
When you need a hand

Casanovas 
for hire

More....